One of the most frustrating things in my life was my dad’s recitation of a poem. It had nothing to do with my dad and everything to do with what the poem said.
The essence of the message is that the ultimate truth is as wonderful and kind as it is scary.
I hated the idea of associating fear, pain, or suffering when seeking the ultimate nature of reality.
I grew up believing that ultimate reality is blissful, wonderful, and free from pain and suffering.
As I progressed and moved along the way – I would come to a point where the pain or some suffering would hit me, and I would then change the course as I was convinced that pain cannot be part of the final equation of life.
Eventually, I realized I was looking for something unknown, yet I had already decided that the final answer must include endless joy and bliss.
I came face to face with my conformity bias.
In essence, I was not looking for the unknown. I was actually looking for that whose ultimate answer has to fulfill the quality of endless joy and bliss.
Once I realized that, it became clear that if I am looking for the unknown, I have to be open to whatever the answer is.
Once I realized that everything changed.
Realizing that pain, fear, suffering, and anxiety will be part of life has been the biggest aand most impactful inner transformation.
This has changed two things for me.
1; Embracing the present moment entirely wholly with terror/grief/joy bliss. At one level I cringe at the thought of pain. At the same time – I feel that resisting the inevitability will not remove that.
At a daily transactional level – this feels surreal.
2; Allowing life to flow uninterrupted through me as an expression of ultimate reality, not my journey.