We try to free ourselves from the suffering whose seeds we plant ourselves
Does superiority or inferiority complex have any place in your life? For me it has. Maybe a lot less than it used to have.
I spent a lot of time introspecting on this. Why association with certain people would make me feel inferior? I knew that they were not conspiring to make me feel inferior. Somehow, their presence and their discussion somehow reminded me of my own inferiority.
I used to explain to myself that I am the one who looking at it this way. Nobody was doing it to me. Making me feel a particular way would be the last thing on their mind. They have so many things of their own.
This would never go away. No matter how many times I would try to convince myself – the feeling would not go away.
At this point – I have a confession to make.
A lot of times I have seen myself taking secret pleasure in certain things. For example, when someone who is giving me hard time falls in trouble. Or feeling superior inside for some of my materials possession.
I noticed more and more situations where I could see myself feeling that superiority.
Then it dawned on me that the secret pleasure I was having from feeling superior to others was the poison pill that was keeping me in this disease of superior/inferior rut of mind.
I was trying to cure my feeling of inferiority only. I was trying to be free from the feeling of discomfort. I was not letting go of my secret pleasure.
In fact, it is not about superiority or inferiority. It is about all the things we are deeply attached to.
So next time you get bothered by anything check if you have the other end of the rope in your hand.
This is not a panacea – but for me, it has helped me get insight into my inner world and helped me understand the root of my own suffering.
